NuclearDonkey.net

My last memory of going to a Virginia DMV was getting to the one in Fair Oaks Mall two hours before they opened, and still being number twenty-some in line. And so it was with great trepidation that I drove to the DMV in Christiansburg to renew my expired registration.

Oh, what a difference living in a small town makes! I ended up having to make two visits and both times was in-and-out in under ten minutes. On the second trip, I was just sitting down to wait when they called my number. Thank you, C-Burg DMV!

I'm the town of Christiansburg. My standard operating procedure is to:

• Arbitrarily decide that someone who always pays their property tax bill owes me $57 for some reason. I've got to make money somehow!
• Put a hold on the person's DMV account so they can't renew their registration at the end of the year.
• Otherwise, not tell them about the money due, so the person never finds out about it until a year later when trying to renew said registration.
• Be unable to explain what the $57 is for. I just know that this person owes me $57 and that ought to be enough.
• Not accept payments online. After all, the internet isn't a truck whereas a physical check will be delivered in a US Postal Service truck.